“Trapped inside the body that does not want to be seen or to engage in any way. The body that wants to be silent, to observe and not to interact. The body that is completely disconnected from the world, but not dead-only in another universe, isolated. Hiding. She felt how she could open her mouth to scream and still voice silence. She was warm and cozy in herself. She made believe that she had a whole sustainable cosmos inside of her with no urge to break away.”
Who is hiding??
I have never considered “hiding” as one of my problems. Definitely not the kind of problem that “keeps you up at night”, but also not as a smaller daily problem, like the cracked skin on my hands during the winter…ouch!
You see, the thing about hiding is that until you stop hiding, you are also hiding from yourself. So it’s a bit tricky to tune into that situation. (But no worries, read on!)
So, to be honest, there have been looong periods of time when I was feeling energized, fruitful and content, and yet apparently and without having the slightest clue–I was hiding.
So what is this lil’ devil “hiding”?
How is it different from keeping your privacy?
How is it different from time away to recharge?
How is it different from gestation time?
How is it different from being pulled into life’s demanding surprises?
Let’s tackle this “reverse engineer” style:
Here are some obvious and less obvious examples of a “Hiding Resume”:
- Hiding is having a picture other than of yourself as your online avatar.
- Hiding is keeping your art, poems, inventions in a closet.
- Hiding is not offering opportunities for people to work with you (aka “book/buy now).
- Hiding is not telling your partner what you want.
- Hiding is not using a talent you secretly know you have.
I chose these as a starting point list, because they are common and easy to work on if you are mindful. If fact, some can be dealt with immediately!
As you can see hiding is not just about visibility, or rather, visibility is way bigger than showing yourself physically. I believe we are all hiding sometime, somehow, somewhere. It’s not possible to eliminate hiding altogether, but it is a muscle we can play with “hide & seek”! Every time you spot another hiding spot, be glad you found it, and no blaming please! Now you can play with it.
The good thing is that once aware, even if you go to hiding again, at least you know you are.
Can you name ONE way you have experienced hiding in the comments below?
See this as an act of confession + step of un-hiding 😉